Body Corporate Managers Are Turds

No surprises so far.

Not to be outdone by their Australian counterparts, the managers of Olympic Heights Condominiums Association have taken low service levels and high margins to a whole new level.

We received our first electricity bill yesterday. Slipped under the door in the dead of night and presented to us by Nerri, the 'bill' was on the letterhead of the condo's association. It seemed odd to be getting a bill from them and not the electricity company but I didn't give it much thought until I saw the cost for the period 22nd Dec - 21st Jan, 4,120 pesos (or $137 AU). Not a huge amount in cash terms, but worrying given the size of the apartment and the fact that we live in a developing country where presumably costs should be cheaper.

My beloved, already fired up after another round of telling family members to get a job and them responding with the normal yawn and San Miguel beer-inspired burp, hopped on to the phone to call the downstairs office.

After the expected 3 minutes of her talking and them not understanding (it wasn't a language barrier, they just don't seem to understand things), my beloved finally had them agree to send up the original bill directly from the one and only electricity provider in The Philippines. Joan Kirner would be proud.

The bill gets delivered to our door 20 minutes later. Whereas I had been expecting a forgery of some description, it did appear to be an original bill with only one small problem - it was the electricity bill for the entire building.

One more phone call, 3 minutes of non-comprehension and then the final answer; there is no bill for our unit. "How then", enquired my beloved, "could we be charged for something that doesn't have a bill?"

"Maam, we take the total bill and divide it evenly by the number of apartments there are in the building".

With little incentive to conserve any energy, I write this post from the bedroom with lights on in the bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, lounge room and utility room with all air conditioning units running at full speed.