My Best Friend is a K-9 Called Larry

There seems to be no shortage of guns in Eastwood City.

Tall ones, skinny ones, fat ones and short ones; revolvers, shotguns, machine guns and rifles; all types of weaponary accessorise the bright white uniforms of the Eastwood City Security Force.

Of the more hairy variety are members of the Eastwood City K-9 unit, a rather sleepy looking collection of german shepards whose duty it is to sniff out any explosives.

A reader may be mistaken to believe Eastwood City is therefore one of the more secure places in Manila until you come face to face with the 'security force'. A suit may maketh the man but a gold shield, elaborate braiding and a license to kill does not necessarily make a security guard.

To be fair, I have never been impressed with our security guards back home either, a rag tag collection of obese men in their 60s and Indian students who look like they have just finished puberty. The difference however is that the Chubb force are not armed to the teeth with enough American weaponary to hold down the Alamo nor would they ever contemplate using an upturned rifle as a stool to rest their weary heads (I kid you not).